This week has been quite emotional one for me... something I hadn't quite anticipated. 10 years since my original diagnosis. 10 YEARS! WOW! How is that possible?
Having had a biopsy with ultra sound the week before I returned to see the Breast Cancer specialist doctor not really concerned. I was breast feeding my then 7 month old daughter and was assured that it was just a blocked milk duct, nothing to worry about. So, when I sat in his office and he asked me "Have you come in on your own?", I looked surprised and simply replied, "No, I've got the baby with me.". Of course that was not what he had meant and after telling me the news, which didn't really register, I wasn't allowed to drive home (and rightly so).
Then began my cancer journey as so many of us have embarked upon, not realising how significantly it would change my life.
Its given me the strength to face my demons and the courage to realise my dreams and most importantly the time and appreciation to enjoy my babies to the full. Having cancer and subsequent hair loss from chemotherapy gave me the idea of Bold Beanies and a business which allows me to help others going through treatment with my soft, silky, comfortable and yet stylish beanie hats; my small business permits me to work from home allowing me to look after my daughters (Olivia now 13 and Lotte, 10) and always be there for them... and also to win not one, but two female innovation and inventors awards (BFIIN and EUWIIN) for which I am immensely proud.
On Wednesday I had my yearly Oncology appointment with my oncologist here at the Shooting Star unit at the hospital in Wrexham. I have now taken tamoxifen for nine years and so another year to go before I finish this part of my treatment prevention plan. Olivia and Lotte are performing in the musical Joseph this week and therefore weren't in school and came with me to my appointment. I had no idea how emotional this would make me. Seeing the chair free which I would always sit on as it has space to the side for Lotte's push chair... leaving behind us a trail of raisins. Scared and never wanting to leave her for fear I might not have much time left to be with my beautiful girl. Olivia started school the week I started chemo and I would wait impatiently for her to be home everyday.
Mr Cochrane, the lovely man that had diagnosed me and had taken such good care of me ten years ago came to see us in the waiting room and could hold back my emotions no longer. He hugged me and I cried.
He got to see how the baby he had known has now grown and I got to thank this wonderful man for saving my life, giving these girls the chance to have their mummy and mostly for giving me the chance to be their mummy. I am so very very grateful.
I'd like to take this opportunity to thank every single person that has helped me along my journey. I invite you all to look forward to the next 10 years with me... the launch of my new book 'Hope' and later in the year Dream and Love (if I get my act together!).
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Twitter Bold Beanies: @boldbeanies https://twitter.com/BoldBeanies?lang=en-gb
Twitter Hope Dream Love: @H0PEDREAML0VE
Bold Beanies are silky cotton soft thin beanie skull skullie caps hats for hair loss. Wear them on their own as beautiful breathable day or night (sleep) headwear or layer under scarves, hijabs, turbans or helmets for something soft and natural next to a sensitive scalp. Gorgeous range of Liberty Art Fabric prints and plains for men, women, girls and boys. Beautiful traditional yet practical hair loss (chemo alopecia or hair thinning) gifts - the bold beanies bouquets to show you care. Customisation available on all plain custom hats and silk accessories and iron on patches available. Check out the latest gift the graffiti greetings bold beanie... a unique greetings 'card' hat especially designed for secret santa, colleague and class mates in mind.
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